Whenever I have memories like this, I hope I’m making it up, although I don’t know why I would make it up. It’s possible something surreptitiously slipped into my mind like things get into my dreams.

After 15 years of therapy, I can pretty much tell if I’m getting a memory. I usually get it separately: first I remember something happened, then I get the physical recollection, and next the emotional. Or it may be the emotional before the physical.

I know some people are capable of killing and torturing others, but it’s hard to accept these things happened to me. If the Spirit hadn’t given me the ability to split my consciousness into parts, I’d probably be dead.

I’m afraid to tell anyone about the violence and, degradation I witnessed and experienced. How could anyone believe another human being could be so, so, abominable? There are no words.

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