Today I couldn’t seem to do anything right. I was packaging books to mail and doing it backwards. I’ve been moving slower than usual. For some reason I am having some recurring female problems. I don’t feel comfortable going into detail.
Anyhow, it never occured to me that my body tells me to slow down and take it easy. I never listened until today. I just thought there was something inherently wrong with me.
All of my life I felt separate from my body. When I was younger I had to be divorced from the feelings in my body to survive. My body was abused and tortured. What I never realized was that I was continuing those strategies today, like right now. That’s after many years of therapy.