It is very difficult for the kid part of myself to understand that my dad did not love me, and I did nothing to make it happen.  As a kid it made more sense to me that it was my fault.  It hurts less when I can blame myself and if feels safer.  I feel like I would have had some sort of control over the situation.It is very difficult for the kid part of myself to understand that my dad did not love me, and I did nothing to make it happen.  As a kid it made more sense to me that it was my fault.  It hurts less when I can blame myself and if feels safer.  I feel like I would have had some sort of control over the situation.

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