May 8, 2011

What I do. *trigger*

Posted in Struggle, trigger at 5:58 pm by radicalhope

This is what I do when I am low, miserable, feel like dying, and blame myself for blaming myself.

Somewhere in the bottom of my mind is an idea that what I am thinking may not be true.

I am mostly thinking that I am worthless; a mistake that should have miscarried, been aborted or at least killed as a small child as some innocent children are.

Whose beliefs are they?  Hmmm, it would take too much energy to think about that.

So I burn some musk or lavender or sandalwood incense, put on some soothing  positive music, organize or read or create something.

Keep it all to myself because no one believes or understands.

And hope it works this time.

7 Comments »

  1. kate1975 said,

    I’m glad that you have some comforting things to do. And sorry that you were taught to believe such hateful things about yourself. Been there myself.

    Would you consider submitting this post to the Blog Carnival Against Child Abuse this month? The deadline is May 18th. Here is the link to submit it:

    http://blogcarnival.com/bc/submit_355.html

    Good and healing thoughts to you.

    Kate

  2. radicalhope said,

    Thank you Kate for inviting me to participate in the Blog Carnival!

    Another thing that also helps me is being out in nature. I like to hear the wind blow through the trees and feel a breeze on my face. I just got a new clothesline. I have been drying my clothes at the laundrymat for the past few months and really missed the smell of fresh air on my clothes and sheets.

    • kate1975 said,

      Nature does it for me as well. It is so restful and healing for me. Please consider submitting a couple of your posts, that would be great.

      Good and healing thoughts to you.

      Kate

  3. [...] What I Do *Trigger* [...]

  4. Nature also helps me to be grounded and centered into my body and who I am. Thanks for sharing this with Blog Carnival Against Child Abuse.

  5. marjakathriver said,

    Wow. I can so relate. I agree with Kate, nature really works for me. I feel like I actually BELONG there. Thank you so much for your courage in sharing with us for the blog carnival.

  6. vickiinaz said,

    I think it is meant to be, even given to us that nature should be a healer. I believe you. Thank you for sharing this with us.


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